Saturday, 20 February 2016

The Flaming Aircrafts Apocalyptic Dream

Had another apocalyptic dream. Again same sister present. I'm looking out the window the stars are moving too fast but they look too orange to be stars.

Then it's like the screen of the sky is lowered or my eyes zoom in a little. I see clearly that it is aircrafts on fire.

Then it seems I have a false awakening. I look up in the sky tell sister about what I saw and have imminent feeling to group  everyone together. Some kind of war was about to take place, war is what was going to cause the apocalypse.

Wednesday, 17 February 2016

The black tornado dream

In the dream looking out of window, in the middle of town black smoke, then turns into a black tornado. An apocalyptic feeling. Tell sis R bout this to quickly alert her, show her but it disappears and she does not see it. Then I look again see it turning into a more ferocious tornado, growing bigger.

Other dreams also vivid but this is the only one I recall. Upon waking up felt things moving around my body. Kundalini text reveal this as snake movements around the body. However, I kept thinking what if it was parasites because I have been focusing on detox and stuff so I would think that.

Dream symbology black tornado probably means the end of something or could even be interpreted as the beginning of something have to see my current life circumstances to interpret this.

Yesterday I repeated  sat naam

Monday, 15 February 2016

Another Morning Sexual Incident

Last night read some SGGS (Sri Guru Granth Sahib) and some after awakening around 4 am. By 5 am I attempt to relax and get some sleep. I'm instantly awakened with some sexual arousal that is hard to contain. I am sleeping on my right side. I can feel something holding me in this position. There are amorous feelings coming from it. The closeness is too real. I can feel pressure applied to the side of the neck. I look and see my right arm raising up.

There wasn't that sense of violation, I felt too close to this unknown presence. Tingling and other sensations present, intoxicated trying my best to control myself. When I open eyes I feel right arm underneath resting seeming to have been lifted. It was definitely not right physical arm that moved but a copy or version of it.

No tired feelings, but not too energetic although today got more done than usual.

I feel though what if it is the combination of the others that I see giving me the feeling of being close to something and inducing sexual feelings. I mean after all this human form is what I perceive to be a combination of exactly that at least in those deep Salvia induced meditative states.

Friday, 12 February 2016

Entity sexual experience

Last night I must have fell asleep around 2 or 3 am after being awake for quite long. Also I was pondering the nature of Self, the great mind, that one that alone exists. I thought about all the people, all the things imagined. I focused on mantra I am. My entire night also went about communicating with my surrounding, pondering each particle as Self, I am. Connecting with it all.

I went to bed relaxed but no sleep. All I recall is naturally focusing on nothing, but then felt a cessation of sound and breathing, as though breathing had left or transformed into something un-sensable.

There was silence complete quiet and then a feeling of something coming next to the body. A light bubbly floating kind of weight. On top, felt it all around the legs, and then what followed was like sexual intercourse. My left cheek had a very intense sensation like something touching it there.

There were deep sensations in the forehead area I'm assuming something being done to the third eye. There was also that feeling I get on Salvia where beings that compose the body were moving away, as if retiring from the act of being the body parts. I could sense them. With eyes closed there were also the shadowy silhouettes but was a little faint.

I wasn't quite aroused sexually but stayed silent and still. A few times moved about. Then I just tried my best to sleep but when I went deeper my head jerked with a jolt and I was startled. After a while tried to sleep it off. I woke up feeling not having slept well, missed out on a lot of sleep.

Wednesday, 10 February 2016

If nobody is real then who am I?

Nobody was at home the others arranged so that house is empty for what was about to take place.
I read online about the words I am, is used as a mantra. I soaked leaves walking around chanting I am and looking at the beings embedded in the surrounding making them aware of my attempt. In times long gone language was different word I am wasn't used but it's the name the word it's the feeling that those words no matter in what language evoke. Without even taking salvia as I looked around me I got the same kind of sense and visual I get on Salvia.  I got started with the chewing. Going deep so many realizations came at once one was about bible as I saw the beings unravel I realized they were not about human beings like current day human beings they were about these beings. Our nature was different more holistic. I kept focus on I am entering whole state of mind as usual breath leaving, dead state but then throat keeps swallowing salvia. Like throat or some other part of body trying to indicate that I'm not quite dead. Then something extraordinary happens, the realization that no body really exists is present, they're all part of mind, like imagination but this has happened before why is it so extraordinary now because the reality of it hit me so hard I would liken it to trauma. I had tears dropping and that sensation was phenomenal. I was able to shout out though I didn't need to.

I demanded if those around me are not real and part of the mind then who am I. I asked loudly strongly clearly and the answer came to me in a knowing sense. I could feel a wave of beings rushing and felt something was about to happen. The light ceiling came to life everything was alive and dancing and moving. The answer is there, in the very atmosphere, in the surroundings. A part of the mind does not want to accept it, accept the fact that I am God. I am the God in the bible, I am what Jesus meant by "the father and I are one", I am the human God of the Egyptian times I am the servant that becomes one with the Lord in the Guru granth sahib. I am the very God in every creation. The Self of the Self. I am. Meditate mantra I am, the feeling it arouses is important. This is what Krishnamurti meant when he said Is not the observer the observed?

Friday, 5 February 2016

The Unicorns

Yesterday as I went to bed I simply asked in my mind why a particular person had shown up in my reality, the purpose and reason behind it and why I suddenly craved for this companionship.

Went to bed and closed eyes I dozed off within a few minutes. I felt gargling sensations coming from the stomach and knew I did not eat right also very dehydrated. My mind fully awake but body went into an instant coma and external sounds as well as all senses became intense. Forced the right side of body out of the paralysis and quickly drank just a few sips from water bottle.

Back to bed I had the most amazing cinematic type dreams.

A Bollywood Dream Production
First I recall dreaming about several bollywood actors and a new movie production. In the dream I am making comparison between Salman Khan and Shah Rukh Khan in terms of attraction. SK had even features and SRK not so even but one thing both had in common was they both had hair transplant and SRK is describing procedure to me. Suddenly they are debating about religion between Hinduism and Islam and I think there was some mention of Christianity. In reality both actors follow Islam.

Suddenly the scene changes to a bollywood movie production only I am viewing it in proper 3D as if alive with the characters. First scene Madhuri Dixit is in between certain trees with black scarf on her head, her face very natural and pretty. SRK is telling her something about keeping something and I get impression the conversation is regarding a child. Next scene involves Deepika Padunoke where she sings about being in love with SRK but she wants to transform that love into Gods Love. Somehow this entire movie becomes religious in some sense.

The Missing Boy
I then went on to dream about a missing boy, where me and others were searching for him for many years. Finally we get to an island where there are men who all would be around the same age as the missing boy but all of them looked similar to the boy. Because of this we had to observe the characteristics of each of the men to figure out which one was the missing boy. I remember speaking to one of the men and had a deep feeling that he was the one.

The Unicorns 
This dream is set in the woodlands, a beautiful fairy tale like forest but at the same time very much like any woodlands you would find now but still very ancient. There's a woman with a horn, the spiraling type a woman who is a Unicorn. She is accompanied by an ordinary looking short plump man and another woman who moves away from the scene. It then turns very sexual as the man induces sexual feelings in the human unicorn. The sensations are all very intense but strangely the act of stimulation here is so different to how sex is perceived today. It seems as if he was powering her up, there was no sense of lust. She has a few apples in her hands and begins to eat them.
They move along and somewhere in the distance there is a male unicorn observing and following them. His horn is bigger and has a smooth texture, no spiral. It's also long whereas  the female horn is shorter. He approaches the short man if he can join them, that he will protect the female unicorn. The short man walks off without saying anything as if he knew this plan all along.
Soon the male unicorn joined the female unicorn on an odyssey. At some point he reveals a structure that he designed and built for her. She seemed uninterested, completely uncaring but it seemed it was actually just her nature to be care free. One would think she was playing hard to get whilst he was chasing her endlessly hoping for some kind of acknowledgement. She sits down occasionally glancing at the structures. The structures are large round encircled whole lot of nothing, inside them are small round clay bowls. He tells her that they're not yet complete. Grabbing a shovel he dumps some earth into the structures, they begin to expand revealing more of his creations, then some more earth and it spins and things pop up from underground. The entire scene is rather magical yet his companion seems only mildly interested.

I wake up at this point. These dreams are amazingly vivid and cinematic I wish I could dream like this every night.

Thursday, 4 February 2016

A Dance We Go

I fell asleep after a while and then awakened at 5ish am. Last night I thought I would wake up with back pain as I decided to sleep on hard base of bed with makeshift mattress especially since I felt pain under ribs was from sleeping on bad mattress. However when I woke up had the best night sleep ever and I've heard sleeping on the floor, obviously on something soft, has helped people align spine hips etc

I attempted to relax simply letting go. Suddenly there was an awareness of a body. The arms were raised and it felt as if it was my arms but not arms from this reality. The arms began to move in a very eloquent way, each movement carefully thought out and both arms in sync. It was like my other experiences where I felt I had no possession over the body, something else was controlling it. As it moves I hear a male voice speaking "I am here. I am always with you." The arms begin to stroke the breasts of this body and raising sexual energy only it was not lustful but very sexually potent. I remember at some point because of the energy the right leg raising up, body entirely naked. I am a part of this Other, it's a blending. I feel like I am It and It is me but different, I didn't feel like I was the body or that I could even say it was mine, it was more like I was seated inside of it like a passenger in a car. So many other events taking place. In front of me I am viewing a screen of ancient Indian (Asian) dancers, focused on the woman in the middle a story unfolds.She is some kind of a spiritual woman, a shaman of sorts. The arms of what I perceived to be mine but controlled by It began to move as if to dance and the women in the screen all began to move in sync with this motion as if the arm motion was some kind of signal but simultaneously a part of that motion. Everything was connected, I felt in that motion I was the dance. Something about this was sacred.

I felt this is the deepest I have gone seeing that body in that state, it is getting more vivid.

Salvia Divinorum UK Ban

Before this session I read numerous articles about salvia being banned in the UK under new legislation which probably will go into effect May 2016. Click here for more about the ban

Around 9pm got the session started.
Deep meditative state concerned about the ban on Salvia they are aware of this and in a joking manner tell me that the pretend government and the pretend legislation cannot take away this meditative state nor my absorption into my true self. Pain on left side ribs aware of it as an energy. These pains are conceptual and not actual. Jk thoughts about his awakening, when his brother died this feeling of loss compelled him to ask questions to dive deep within himself. Sound constructs a way to delve deep into meditation had distiller running.

I've also felt for some time that I have to stop depending on Salvia to enter this state, it has become like a crutch.

Tuesday, 2 February 2016

A natural transition

Yesterday evening around 7pm I chewed small amount of Salvia, mostly crumbled remains.

Prior to chewing I set an intention and even spoke to the energies all around. Mostly all the beings that help to put the physical matter together creating this great illusion. I asked them to help me connect with the Creator, to unite with it and help me uncover the name of The One that is mentioned in several religious texts.

I knew I had to stop the body from moving, even a slight movement can break from going deep. There was an awareness of all the energies that composed the body, moving away and I was there joined with them. There was a dry sensation in my throat which I felt as some of the other beings inducing it, meaning making me feel as if  I need to cough and I gave in and coughed and they became even more aware of the 'me' physically focused.

I turned on led light on phone. Closed eyes and tried to continue with the meditation but had to remove the chewed leaves that were left in my mouth. 

Transitioning to that state felt completely natural that it was always this easy. I am always able to go to that state naturally and I felt that I did, all of it was so familiar it is our actual nature to be in that state.

I grabbed the phone and viewed an image of a person, it felt strangely alive what I mean by that is the image of this person was not just an image but an actual person moving. It was like the energies all around were controlling this image. There was a movement coming from the person in the image almost as if to turn around and look at me directly from their side view pose. I started to see the control of everything around. I am aware in some religions and cultures it is forbidden to make images and sculptors of people and suddenly understand why they did this.

Around me are the larger beings, they are encircling the bed and observing. I close eyes to go deeper, my feet and hands start to heat up, they felt like they were on fire. The sensation in the soles of the feet would cause a severe amount of pain had I not been in that state although a few times I was thinking of telling them to stop as it felt dangerous for the body.

Having had this happen before I knew I had to stay still to allow them to continue. This heat and incident was very much like another experience I had, New Clothes Psychic Surgery.

As I relaxed several sexual images popped up in my head as if to entice me to release the energy. I swatted all the images like annoying flies.

A more scientific perspective of why the hands and feet heated up like that could probably be that I had about 500mg of niacin, cayenne chilli pepper in soup and with the vasodilating effect of both niacin and salvia probably concentrated the heat in veins around hands and feet. However I felt the heat energy had some kind of healing effect.

Monday, 1 February 2016

Giving Thanks Before You Experience Eating

Salvia chewed just a small amount. Here are some notes from phone again will update with more details on each point later:

01/02/2016 around 3am could not sleep meditated with salvia
Master act of dying they're onto me
Fasting purpose is so that body is like the dead
Empty content bowels etc
Read book of dead
They're in the food
They're everywhere
That's why I'm so cautious of the germs from certain person
Sleep = playing dead
Now I understand why Jesus said eat at others whatever given can't hurt you
They are the food itself they are beings
Feeling of hunger
It's false
Put on by them I can feel they have combined their self to make me feel like a person a human
Smells sounds everything like this
They've induced hunger urge so much
Never felt this hungy
That's why certain food can be bad for some
But this is how Plato was able to survive cyanide
Could have survived anything want to feel food taste
Hunger of a pig
Now I know why pig prohibited
Could take characteristic of anything
Any animals
Any food has power to heal
Speak to it
Befriend them say command
Say move to a mountain
It will
I took on the consciousness of a pig LOL
After eating bacon
They prohibited because we take on the qualities of a pig
If I was permanently in that state there would be no hunger
Now I understand breatharianism
I'm living off ideas
As I typed on phone I felt the trillions of living beings that went into creating the illusion of my phone
That's an idea

Morning woke up feeling very feverish, body temperature almost 37 but not quite. I added iodine to some bacon after having the thought that it would increase body temp and has been working though I did have some cramps.