Friday, 30 April 2010

Noise pollution

When I tried to go back to sleep, desperately at 6am since sleep seemed impossible I eventually got to a relaxed state. I was hoping not to experience any AP activity just dreamless, stateless pure resting sleep. Then the roaring started and I felt that I was not too far from an aircraft. It was incredibly annoying but at that moment I was so certain that the astral noise people commonly hear during the initiation of an AP is noise pollution that is created in the physical side. Also I feel that during those states our sensitivity is so increased, the senses are also amplified to such a degree we will hear all kinds of junk unless we are able to tune in appropriately.

I have read about some theories on this, some say it's part of the transitioning of consciousness or transferring to a light body. It could be that this noise is the M Band Noise that Robert Monroe refers to as being uncontrolled thought. I suddenly feel like exploring more of the astral but lately I have been plagued with so many issues that 'me' time is very rare now.

Monday, 26 April 2010

Stomach Pumped Dreams

Last night after an incredibly taxing argument between family members I went to bed relieved to just let go of everything. There was some pumping going on in my stomach, like a pair of hands was squeezing my organs - just ignored and went to sleep.

Woke up at 5am from a dream about my brother who is serving several months in prison. The dream was crystal clear and had to do with everything that I have been planning in reality to inform my brother when he calls next time. In the dream I'm on the phone speaking with him but at the same time I am getting images of him, the prison cell etc. He is telling me about his situation and a group of bully, one particular bully who has an entire family targeting him.

I immediately give him information about a man in the same prison as him who can help him out which I've been wanting to do since finding out about this person yesterday. My brother seems very pessimistic as he often is, I encourage him and make him aware of his options. When I woke up I felt really strange, I was so certain that I somehow did have that conversation with him - that somehow it got to him.

After going back to sleep at 6ish am I had a series of very bizarre twisted dreams and one was very lucid.

Wolf Man
I first dreamt about a man, he had a haircut like a werewolf and also his presence was very wolfish. There was something very ferocious about him, he seemed ready to attack at any moment. Suddenly what I can describe as sexual energy began to radiate within, I felt a magnetic pull towards this scary looking fella. My thoughts on this energy is that it is just a fragment of the full potential of energy available to all and when we get just a tiny incomplete amount of it, it is expressed or channeled through a sexual outlet. In its more complete form it is a creative energy, the very essence that gives life and move mountains.

After this I don't recall acting out any of the desires just that wherever I went the Wolf Man would follow me, suddenly popping out of nowhere.

Dream Wakers
I see a different man this time - he's dressed street style just bopping about in the air. I quickly conclude that 'I must be dreaming'. As soon as I'm aware and shouting out to DC dreamscape begins to fade and with some effort I remained lucid for a little longer.

There is a woman named Dana, a great misfortune is about to befall her suddenly in the wake of an ordinary life. I see her as just any normal person, she is going about her normal everyday life. I feel that a part of me is in her, somehow there is a deeper connection here I can't seem to understand. I am looking at her as an image, she is external but also I am within her being as if I am her - difficult to explain.
Suddenly I just wooshed out and I find that I'm turning a page in a book commencing to the next chapter. This is a book about Dana, the following pages are filled with disturbing and saddistic accounts of unbelievable torture - the point of the torture was to bring some kind of experience or knowledge out which reminded me of the movie Martyr that I didn't watch but read the synopsis - a movie I decided not to watch for good reasons. I think to myself what on earth I'm doing with such a horrifying book. I wake up from this dream at 7:45am feeling really out of it.

Saturday, 24 April 2010

Scorpio & Lesson

There is a weird looking large bug flying about, it lands on my eldest sister. She panics and tries to slap it off her dress. As it lands on the ground I realize it's a scorpio. Someone is picking it up and I feel like I am about to faint. Scorpion Totem

I'm in a classroom set outdoors, we are standing on dirt. We are learning about an animal which I can't recall right now. Teacher asks questions.

"Where does this animal live?"

I make wild guesses and shout out "Under the ground". I got it right, I am so excited I love this game.

"What are the reasons for living under the ground?" There are others making several guesses until finally I shout out "Food". I am right once again.

"What is another reason why it lives under the ground?" I thought it through and realized that this creature lives under the ground hiding. I knew this was the answer but thought deeply about it. Why would it hide under the ground? From what or whom was it hiding from? At this stage the teacher was focused on me as though he knew I was on to something. Before I could figure it out I woke up.

This past week I have been waking up at the exact time every morning at 6:27am with heavy feeling in head and in a groggy state whether I sleep early or very late seems to make no difference.

Thursday, 22 April 2010

The Headaches

Lately upon waking up my head has felt like it had been crushed, sometimes with sudden movement the pain would localize in specific areas of the head. Once walking down the stairs I got what started out as a head rush and the pain near the temples. Felt as though my brain had erupted on those two sides. The worst of course is waking up in the morning with crushing pain - will be looking for herbal remedies for this. I think this is likely to be Kundalini related, I have read that the headaches are likely due to a build up of excess energy.

Lately a lot of challenges have entered my life, they have caused a lot of stress, I mean a tremendous amount but they have also elucidated certain points that I was not willing to face previously. The incidents took place in just a span of one day - two incidents. It's almost as if I'm being pushed to move on, to break away from the old in order to make way for the new. I realized that with the changes that have taken place I have been very resistant - rather than the actual incidents I think it is the resistance that is causing the stress. Right now I'm feeling like there is more to be expected.

I am almost certain that whatever force is making these changes, destroying life as I know it is the same energy that will replace the old way of life with something more than I have been able to dream up and honestly I'm looking forward to it.


This is a short dream I had yesterday morning, very vivid.

I am standing in front of a man and for reasons unknown I feel wonderful in his presence, almost certain that his beautiful smile is having an effect on me. He's caucasian, tall and very handsome. Suddenly I am moving a box and he begins to speak "Remember the first time we met you were busy moving a red box, I stood there just gazing and smiling for no reason". As he continued this rambling on about this memory I realized that at the same time we were re-enacting the scene. I faced him and as my eyes met his gaze there was a sense of instant recognition and slowly I began to remember something. The memory wasn't of any particular incident but of strong feelings. "I remember" I started saying. "I remember I loved you, I still love you and I always will".

I can't quite recall what happened after this, there was a sense of embrace but I had woken up with this much recollection.

Monday, 12 April 2010

Crown Mining (Drill)

Woke up at 3:50am, it's easier to wake up at these times when menstruating otherwise lately I've had no interrupted sleep. I was in a really good mood with positive thoughts swimming in my mind and the birds chirping very loud in a rythmic pattern was also helping. By 5am I started to relax and with closed eyes drifted hoping that I might just AP. I was moving around in a dark space, I could see but unable to comprehend what I was looking at. The sounds were loud, roaring and gushing wind.

Suddenly I felt myself back in bed, drill impact at the crown of my head - it was loud and sensational. I felt a squeamish feeling coming on. As usual this sensation was uncomfortable though not painful, this time I thought seriously about what was taking place. I asked if whatever was doing this had good intentions and if not to leave. The drilling carried on, I turned over in a struggle to rest on my front side which took some time knowing at that point that I was still very physical.

Breathing deeply I felt energy drawing up towards my third eye chakra and then I started entering dream states that I can't recall so clearly right now. After a few seconds of dreams that actually felt like they were rather long I would return to the physical body. Upon returning I realized the dreams were distracting me from the physical process. I continued drawing energy to the third eye thinking this distraction will help. Floated up, got a quick look at my room, still dark I swooshed backwards, despite the automated movement there was that concern of 'whether I'm still physical'.

Back in bed, the drilling continued - the time was 6:30 am. Surrendered to the sensation in the hope that sleep would take over.

Thursday, 8 April 2010

Creating Consciously

Last year I put my intentions on hold especially with a lot of inner work being done I just couldn't focus on any particular intentions. I have to admit my materialstic even non-materialistic manifestations were not pleasing me, it was like nothing bought with it any kind of satisfaction. In fact it was like I was searching for something that was unreachable and each search was a dead end bringing with it a sense of uncertainty. I think feeling like that was important because it drew me more towards trying to understand who I am. Then the Kundalini began to take over, a time that was very detoxiyfing and now I feel I've been born again with a sense of renewed purpose and so I hope to journal as much as I can about these new intentions, my dreams and purpose.

Here's some of the areas that I need to be more intentional with:

Relationships - I don't mean just a life partner and my relationship with other people but also the relationship that I have with myself because it is this relationship that determines every other relationship.

Business - Since last year I have become less and less business oriented but I want to be more productive in this area so that I can get my business to a good sellable level and do what I really want to do.

My more long-term goal is a lifestyle transition and those who have read the ringing cedars know what I'm talking about. To be brief I want to return to the elements of nature and live life as it was originally intended. I realize that something like that won't happen over night so I am making as much good use of my time as possible right now.

History of Conscious Manifestations and Synchronicity

A list of things that I've successfuly manifested:

FRUITS - lots of fruits were my first ever successful conscious manifestations.

BOOKS - early on when researching about Law of Attraction I stumbled upon 'The Secret' where I first heard of Abraham and the Hicks. Tbh at first I didn't want to spend any money on Abraham material because of the whole channeling thing (even though I was APing). I felt like it was a trap but I also had this feeling that there was something about this Abraham and so I decided to manifest the book and so about 2 weeks after watching 'The Secret' I got a copy of 'Ask and It Is Given' for free. Some time after this success I decided to manifest 'The Secret' book and the following month got 2 books for free.

£50 M&S Voucher - I got ripped off £25 once and decided that I will be compensated double that amount one night before falling asleep, the following day I recieved an opportunity to get £50 M&S voucher

Neighbours Scaffold removal - this was the most quickest conscious manifestation ever, it took a few minutes. My neighbours had their scaffold attached to their house for almost 2 years, a few seconds I thought about how ugly it looked then decided to change my thoughts and some minutes later I hear bob the builder and his crew taking off the scaffold.

Bits and Bobs - these are the more little things, like razors, bedside lamp etc

An entire modern workstation - a glass desk, LCD monitor, computer, laptop and other bits and bobs

Astral projections, Lucid dreams - this was during a certain period where I thought I'd try to apply LOA to the more non-material areas.

There's more but will need to go through old journals to get them here, for the most part my experimentation with Intentions and manifestations actually go a long way back, long before I even knew anything about Law of Attraction. Some of my more profound experiences are what are known as synchronicity and as an example I'll share one such experience.

I was re-reading an Agatha Christie book and at that time I decided to keep a dictionary handy to find out meanings of certain unfamiliar words. There was one word 'hydrangea' that just seemed like a really interesting word. Looked it up in the dictionary and found that it was a flower, then I wondered what it looked like. At that point I closed the book, flicked through TV channels and stopped at a show that I've only seen one episode of and thought it was utterly boring - it was Gossip Girl. Despite how much I disliked this show I left it on the channel (can't recall why). Within a few minutes one of the character is entering a mansion, here she finds flowers in a vase. She tells her friend how nice they look and her friend tells her that they're hydrangeas which left me stunned even though at that point I was getting used to these synchro's. I was watching the entire show knowing that those flowers would reappear and they did at the end of the show.

I have noticed more synchros - there are just too many to record and they occur almost on a daily basis.