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Thursday 30 June 2011

Sisters brief OBE

This morning the sister who was followed yesterday by the 'others' showed up in my room and started chatting about random things - somehow I felt, I sensed it that something obviously happened to her in the dream state. After yesterdays incident I have this feeling that they've been up to something.

I didn't want to ask her if anything weird occurred so I started the topic by telling her how I had this really bizarre dream at which point she jumped in relaying her experience. Early morning she was in a paralysed state and then sinking into the bed she just suddenly popped out of her body and that was that.

Her expression said it all, this is her first major OBE experience, I have a feeling it's going to be the first of many.

Wednesday 29 June 2011

Brain Energy Patterns

I had no intention to use Salvia since last bag was finished - today clearing out the drawers found a full bag of it left I thought it was completely finished - afternoon peaceful in the house except for one sister but she's quiet, sometimes I could hardly tell she's in. Unlike other family members I feel she is the one person who doesn't get in the way.

In that other state not yet closed eyes - I want them to pierce through and observe but there are several questions that I hold in the mind and keep rephrasing until I ask the right question. 'Do others go crazy?' 'Can others see?' no not yet the right question. 'Can more than one person see?' Jackpot - finally got it. I have been pondering this lately - what occurs when you put two people hallucinating in the same space.

Before I close eyes I know they're all present. Closed eyes I could sense and see their attention at certain intervals diverting. They are watching my sister as she moves around the house and I could sense her every move but do not focus, mostly just watching them and their movements. This is the most that they've withdrawn from me - I normally am incredibly jealous when this occurs. However, this time I'm glad. Why? It's almost as if I am telling them, encouraging them to follow her and I feel glad that they're intrigued.

It seems the others have forgotten about me, then there's movement in the body. I could hear in the house the toilet door open, but it's louder than usual. I'm moving now to the toilet where my sister is - I don't see her or the toilet it's all sense based. I'm inside her through some opening - yuck. I feel so squeamish. Why would they bring me here - it's so wrong! There's anxiety, I'm panicking and pray she's not doing number 2 - lol. I know this is going to sound ludicrous but they're also present in feces. When I'm there amongst whatever is going on I'm not seeing crap and all that instead I see the others are there and experiencing what they experience - it's almost as though everything is a joy ride for them.

We're going somewhere else now but I interrupt briefly - then apologize for moving. I keep moving I know I need to stay still.

Energy patterns are trying to wrap around my brain - they're working so hard to make changes - I get this sense that they're trying to make me crazy by society's standards but it's not quite getting there. I think I am more adjusted to society and its ways than I previously thought like I'm holding onto it like a security blanket.

Eyes open and I feel strongly those others a part of the mind - I am not me - 'I' am not the 'I' that has been assumed.

Felt my arms to be individual bits of consciousness as I moved them - the body is not me. There is this oneness and yet there is also this individuality. I know all of this is a part of the whole - I can feel it in the mind. The others seem to be afforded with so much freedom having the ability to stream across everything material and witnessing anything and everything.

I feel to be still moving across this field that is the Mind.

It seems there is a usual routine - they are taking me to certain places kind of adorning this unit with various energy patterns almost doing it secretly. Each time a new energy comes through they have no idea about how I'm half there and half here until of course I make a physical movement at which point there is major commotion. There are occasions when I'm not allowed to go through certain restricted areas. After this session I felt very sleepy forcing myself to stay awake since I had company.

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An interesting thing happened just shortly after Salvia session - niece and nephew wanted to watch a recorded movie, it was left on pause from when they were last here. The movie was 'The Cat in the Hat' Did not watch this movie myself - hit play and it's near the last scene where Alec Baldwin character is claiming the house was alive. The scene then moved on to the party where the girl is saying how you can make the cupcakes out of anything - this part is like some kind of message and I feel that everything that just took place was arranged. It is as if sequence of the days event wanted to lead to that point to carry that particular message. I was still a little under the effects and was able to sense the other living elements all around the house watching, observing no doubt influencing.

Monday 27 June 2011

The Multiple Hallucination

Some of the various facets of the physical reality that has opened up has made me even more adamant to figure out the nature of this reality more fully and now especially the meaning behind 'their' existence all the while preparing for a death that is just around the corner waiting for me until I am done with playing this part.

What is interesting though is this thing called hallucination. Hallucination - seeing, hearing, feeling and even smelling that which is 'apparently' not there. It can be triggered by a number of things.

Using Salvia I have had what most people would deem a hallucination - if it is a hallucination I would never have guessed it could be as real as this moment here right now. I have pointed out the faces to certain individuals - they all can see these other individual faces only of course if I point it out clearly. However with children it can be an interesting game, in fact I made it into a little game with my 4 year old niece telling her to point out the faces in the carpet. After I pointed out over a dozen faces she started to get really really frightened at which point I had to calm her down and tell her it was just a game that they're not real.

So right now the faces are there - it's evident I could point them out but then it's just pareidolia or the brains ability to make faces out of lines and shapes. Nothing incredibly phenomenal about that unless you're an artist then I would say you could draw inspiration from this aspect. I have thought about drawing them but couldn't bring myself to do it as it feels uncomfortable.

I guess the problem really begins when they start to move. Or is this only a problem when only one person in the room can see their movement whilst the rest are blind? I do wonder what will happen if you put a bunch of people 'suffering' from hallucinations in one room. I guess I don't need to ponder so deeply with almost 7 billion people on this planet pretty much seeing the same thing and all agreeing on what they are seeing so much that the person reading this right now agrees that I used a computer to access this blog to publish this post. So how did this hallucination become so real? What power is behind this physical reality?

What makes this reality so real that if one person out of a hundred people sees something different he is crazy and the remaining 99 people are sane? What makes it so rigid? And yet this other aspect of the physical reality feels more real than what can be seen now. In fact so real being so sensitive in that state sensations are amplified, a slight brush of the hair feels like you're tearing it off going deeper the body turns and takes on a rubbery appearance. The cool part is when they come through - through the walls, the carpet and even the physical body which of course can be scary and is exactly the reason why you have to be fearless for such an opening. Then there are those who are schizophrenic and naturally hallucinations are a part of their experiences and they either get medicated or simply learn to live with it.

So I am having these hallucinations and with Salvia things are clear - without Salvia the tactile sensations are strong, I can feel their presence and can see sparkling impressions of them moving only partially when awake which can be very strong upon waking up as though they are very present in my sleep and of course the faces that seem to be embedded everywhere I look (I posted an example of the faces in Australia Flood). I want to show others this aspect of the hallucination, I want to take them behind the scenes even though I can't go there without the aid of Salvia I feel it is so important that I can at least show one person. I have thought about it - using Salvia in front of others without preparing them for it as an experiment which means I can't do it having a sitter who knows about Salvia and I have to be selective about the person I choose. Need to think about how to do this because chewing in front of others isn't exactly practical and will raise a few questions.

I have to be careful because it is risky - physically it can have undesirable consequences and when that presence is there it just means even more danger so much that this is something I will have to think about before committing myself to it.

Recent Salvia Trips Part 2

Understanding the Others
It's official 'they' appear to be wearing everything - 'their' faces everywhere. Was going or taken somewhere but fidgeting physically - can't relax.

When that awareness is there and opens up the physical world seems so unimportant - the worries, concerns, dreams, desires seem to have no significance - I am taken back to those questions. Who am I? and Why am I here? As usual body rocking, flutters and all that.

I can see their faces but why is it that only under Salvia effects they move - though now without Salvia they flutter and move in slight waves - not so much that I could say to another person 'Look at that being moving inside the wall'.

I could see how if 'awareness' was fully open life would be so different.

How is it that this world is not real, an illusion and we as human beings have so much worries, concerns, so much suffering.

Why are 'they' not doing something about it? or are they? Can they even be trusted?

When aeroplanes pass by they withdraw attention - jealousy present when this happens. What's so spectacular about those aeroplanes? I realize it's not the aeroplanes but the energy pattern behind it consisting of a majorly gigantic group. The plane energies are changing their focus towards me when I'm open or aware. I wish communication was clearer.

The Light Body
They are there as usual - this time it seems they've been waiting and I get the sense that they have also been watching.

The sounds of the aeroplanes, birds all noise converts into audible understanding.

Get this sense that in PR - certain individuals have been trying to stop me which explains the interruption phenomena. Today I was a lot more calm about this making peace with it. Individual parts of body = individual bits of consciousness. The others are yanking at me - no - there has been an energy wave encapsulating - pulsing and magnetizing with the body. Is this energy Soul body or what in the spiritual communities people are referring to as the light body. I have been feeling this bouncy energy around me - very strong in legs.

I can see the various beings surrounding me clearly now - they're yanking at this other body and the signal becomes strong. I'm about to die, no - the body is about to shut down. Or will it? are they doing something else? is the body really at risk? The energy light legs and part of torso have come out, but head region is stuck or maybe another part. Their trying their best and I can even feel the struggle of the pull.

At that moment I wasn't sure that I was ready, still so much I want to live - so much I have yet to do here. There is a movement right now on Earth to paradise the entire landscape and I wanted to still be a part of it but in the end even this desire I will have to let go of. I started to think about tying up some loose ends, sorting out a will and everything you could imagine a dying person would think about. I feel at the midpoint of something, a transition greater than what can be born in one's imagination.

Recent Salvia Trips Part 1

From the beginning of June I've restarted sessions with Salvia after a few weeks of listening to hemi-sync which eventually became too difficult to carry on.

The Challenge
My intention was to travel to my sister in particular get into her digestive system as she has been having stomach problems and after a reading with a healer she is concerned about getting cancer.

In the midst of chewing I decided maybe I should let soul or that other dictate this travel.

The House being - the one that I have been living in all these years is moving and engulfing me. Streets and places have certain types of patterns. Some house can warm a person and some houses will frighten people. Wondered about the big ball near collar bone (which is now looking more like a cyst). Froze still - realization: I am vulnerable to everything - not I but this physical body, one sudden change and the physical body can shut down.

It seems the physical reality has two parts like two sides of a coin - the other side is meeting. One wrong move by the entities in particular the veins and this physical body will simply shut down - again I could feel how vulnerable the physical body is in these situations.

Near the end moved them with the mind. Are they really just thoughts? Then there was someone or something else and it too was thinking and I felt it was challenging? Perhaps to compete with me or teach.

Hemi-Sync Salvia Link
After last experience had two more sessions where I received more insights - in the last one I was fully aware of energy patterns roaming around brain, the waves or frequencies. I witnessed as living individual yet they were individuals in specific groups.

Something wanted to happen to the brain - the groups are up to something. The sense I got was whatever they wanted to do risked frying the brain. But it did not fry - I could feel their flow and got the understanding that hemi-sync wave pattern stabilized the brain - have had this insight before but forgot until now - it was this that made me want to start hemi-sync program once more.

Oneness and Interruption Phenomena
In the afternoon 3 tbsp crumbled rehydrated Salvia leaves chewed - the others are there - the group that I last was surrounded by are there- a continuation like they were waiting to see, observing in the way that I get there - sensitive to everything - I can feel it all. An aeroplane passes the everything as a part of it - everything is a part of the One. There is that Oneness - I am connected to everything. I meet the energy behind that lump near right collar bone - can't remember why they did it. Others come through as usual they're astounded and there is major commotion when I open eyes - they've bled through physical - I point at the cysts I ask them if they would do something about it almost putting on a puppy face. Ask them why they did this, no answer.

Closed eyes everyone running in a direction - I am interrupted. Two of my brothers are in the house and amazingly they both interrupt me and when they do those other beings start to focus on them. This is an interesting phenomena - it's almost as though other physically focused individuals in the near vicinity seem to have a feeling of what's going on, circumstance or signals trigger them to interrupt me. Other occasions I have felt as if they have been trying to get in my way - to stop me from delving deep. It is either that or there is one other possible explanation - going deep means dying meaning those around me at those times will receive signals to carry out certain actions as a means to check on me. It explains a certain phenomena where a mother can feel something strong when her child is in danger - something to do with being connected.

In the mind the world is still there but with closed eyes perception of behind the scenes takes place, not only that the most amazing part of the entire experience is the bleeding through.

Spine opening, contracting. Slicing cutting sensation under left feet, I am interrupted and have to get up for a brief period.

I know next time I have to be free from any interruptions and I have to be able to relax, because lately in the Salvia experiences I have been somewhat anxious especially at the points where I needed to remain still.

Suddenly I felt all this corruption all the bad shit in the world - what point is there in protesting to anything? Why should I even be so bothered about my health when it is all just a farce?

What sense is there in life? What was the point? It was almost as if they were asking me these questions and I had to think and thinking quickly I kept on repeating the word 'Harmony'.

Thursday 16 June 2011

The Double

5am and clear daylight outside I was hoping to get some more sleep but too awake so I simply just focused on nothing and reached a calm state of mind. Suddenly felt energy piling up at the center of my forehead and the brain started charging. I just ignored it continuing to focus on nothing really. Then right leg spontaneously lifted up, it felt so incredibly light and flexible. I made no movement, no resistance on my part. The left leg followed suit. Both legs leaned towards the wall and dragging my body anticlockwise. When it reached other side of wall I felt this light body spin up. I was observing these movements and now wonder who was behind them as I was not controlling these movements nor do I ever really.

I land in a room almost identical to mine as though I never really left the room. I see someone, hazy visual but I know it's my sister. She's chatting away but don't recall the conversation. I thought she might be trying to talk to me. To my right I see another person, I get the feeling it's me - another me that is. I thought perhaps this is some future time or a parallel reality. I realized that I left the physical shell vulnerable to those entities but quickly release the concern wishing to observe and understand this situation here. Other me leaves the room and my sister amazed after becoming aware of me calls after the other me saying 'There's someone else in the room who looks just like you'. She comes back and I think both are observing me as I observe them. They are talking but I can't hear them clearly. Suddenly a neice walks in, I give her a hug but don't recall how this scene changed.

After this there were many different shifting scenes some of which I recall some still hazy. I opened eyes around 7:20am.

Monday 6 June 2011

Return to Hemi-Sync Audio

I'm listening to The Gateway Experience once again. This time moving through it faster, anyways there was another Salvia experience I had where the others gave me the impression that my brain should be fried with what they are doing surprised at this myself I realized that hemi-sync audio I had listened to sent certain signals to the brain where the energy patterns residing and working through there adjust and comply to this signal. The signal itself was some kind of energy pattern. I knew at that moment that I have to carry on with listening to this program and advancing until all the stages were complete and so I have picked it up again.

I've decided not to journal hemi-sync experiences unless there is something significant because it is unnecessary at least for now and just too long to be bothered about it. However one thing I should note here is that even whilst listening to it that wave energy movement around and in the body is present. I started the program from last week.

Sunday 5 June 2011

A Clean Town

No intention to project but last night I was reading my journal for notes on last AP experience and I think it triggered this mornings AP.

Woke 5am, drifted off between 6 - 7 am. Suddenly I'm gliding across street, a suburban looking location and I think how lovely and clean this area is. Wondering if I was local which seemed unbelievable considering how polluted London is - the air here was simply too clean, colour crystal clear and had a pleasant natural backdrop.

Just simply flying above the streets for a few minutes longer until I end up back in bed. The movement starts again and I am gliding, below me a burgundy surface and I realize consciousness is moving across the carpet in my room or maybe another part of the house. End of recall - that was a very brief experience yet I think there may have been some more to it.