Updates First Quarter 2023

I'm going to do quarterly updates or at least try. In the first quarter my dear mother passed away yet her spirit is still with me so that has been a major event so far. I did grieve at first but as time went on it became clearer that she was still with me.

I started a new relationship since January when my mum was still alive and this has been ongoing. 

I am continuing the biohacking but hasn't been effective in the previous lunar cycle  but I'm trying in  current lunar cycle. It might've been effective though as I dealt with grief in a healthy way which has more to do with serotonin. I'm playing around with new ideas and concepts. Mostly looking forward to new formulas. I'm also occupied with a lot of work stuff which is keeping me busy.  

I'm using astrology and astrologic data. As March 2023 comes to an end Ramadan begins. I'm working out my vibration and the effects of biohacking application. March was pretty stressful month so much to focus on so little time...

A Mothers Love After Death

 I have been meaning to do an update, but life had taken an unexpected turn. My mum was quite unwell from last year. Her health was declining and I did my best to help and support her.

In many ways I had become her mother, trying to nurture her and be there whenever she needed me. The older me would've said I sacrificed a lot but the newer me the more understanding mature version now says what I gave up pales in comparison to what she gave me. 

It took her death to make me realise how deep and unconditional her love was for me. My heart was fully open and receptive. Even now I can feel her with me. Though her body had grown weak and had lost the will to hang on, her spirit lingers still.

Since her death some interesting things have happened. One event involved lights flickering and going out and another is she's communicating with my sister through dreams. But another of my sister is having pretty dark dreams.

Along with my mums death there's some new events and incidents that have coming and her passing is kind of a catalyst for that change. 

Whilst I did grieve and feel empty without her, the physical shell I was used to, a deep sense of appreciation awakened within. I felt deep heartfelt gratitude for having her in my life for as long as I have.

I tried to connect with the other side journeying with Salvinorin A but have put it aside for now. The thought came to me that I should use the candle flame where in the past I was able to see beings forming. That is irrelevant though especially with the way I am already communicating with her.

Near Death Experience - Almost

 I almost died (NDE)

woke early 3ish AM browse phone back to sleep by 6:45am

I'm walking out of my room. Brothers near stairs discussing something. I see my keys on door but there's already one hooked onto my clothes. I take off key from door. Both key sets duplicate. I realise I'm dreaming. Turn to see brothers but everything goes blank but I'm still conscious. Suddenly theres light and I see various snippets of my life. Holographic projected virtual images. I see logo of the tips app I did and realise that my life and details of my life are being replayed. My life was flashing before my eyes. This meant my body was dying. I started to fight it and snap out of it. I'm lying on my belly looking to the side thinking I woke up but a bus passes by. I look down and see a road as though bed is suspended high up. Snap out of it. In bed on my front arms over pillow wall expanded then contracts very matrixy

Still feel sleepy.

Awake 7:20am

Updates biohacking and conspiracy

Lunar cycle biohacking - I'm doing the biohacks as best I can. Acetylcholine gave me crazy dreams and made my brain feel to wired. It was however powerful for cognition almost to the point I felt like a supermachine accessing the matrix. I was going through a wordsearch puzzle which previously took me long to solve. With acetylcholine all I did was say the word and my eyes would dart to the exact location. Problem is the stuff I used came with side effects such as nightmares and mental fatigue. I have successfully increased other neurotransmitters. Something is up with dreaming, I tend to have bad recall. The iodine however does improve recall but I forget to take

Conspiracy theories - I have been reading through https://wespenre.com/ levels of learning. Very profound material and there's plenty of info on past lives. If I could successfully raise my acetylcholine with a better formula I just might be able to digest it in a shorter time. There's definitely something going on behind the scenes 

Overcoming fears - this is something I'm trying to work on. As a human race we are operating on too much fear. Our everyday life is based on it

Biohacking and Lunar Cycles

Currently some of the biohacking I'm doing involves working around the lunar cycle which can get pretty intense. 

A new cycle is approaching, 4 more days. During each phase of the moon there's a predominant neurotransmitter. And in each phase there are set of hormones and bodily processes that are activated. One example is the phase between third quarter and new moon - this is the major detox phase and just at the start the brain has more GABA.

If things are unbalanced in the body (toxins etc) then things are not going to be great and especially if you are a woman of childbearing age and you are nearing your menstruation, if so then the body will get prepared to clear out excess hormones etc.

Both men and women may feel like unwinding, relaxing at this time. To heal and detox efficiently the body needs plenty of rest and lots of relaxation. 

We are currently in this phase. I managed to somehow get laryngitis which I think is more toxin related than viral. I'm slowly healing and will be working on detoxing as much as I can but there's that run down feeling and a need to rest. I also feel myself mentally slowing down which seems to be part and parcel of this final phase of current lunar cycle.

This phase is also a time I take to review all the events of lunar cycle. The goals and intentions I set up at the beginning of current cycle will be reviewed in the next few days and events that have taken place.

In the coming cycle I'll be sharing what happens during each phase. I'm still learning so there's still much to discover. I have already achieved activating certain functions and state of mind. 

The most profound thing happened some time ago in the last two years. I experimented with a formula that helped raise acetylcholine levels, all of a sudden I was able to calculate from the top of my head without a calculator. At the time I remember going supermarkets and calculating the cost of my shopping. Which sounds easy enough but I have always been terrible and quite slow with numbers so much that in the moments of releasing acetylcholine I became a human calculator. The same functions were active whilst doing calculations on the computer. Without the calculator.

Again I'm still learning and I have sort of mapped it all out. Currently using lunar cycle as a guide. 

Some functions I want to awaken include better use of language. I'm a lifelong dreamer so I definitely want to enhance my dreamtime. I don't care for lucid dreams much, I'd much rather have those epic adventure type dreams. I definitely want improved memory functions. 

There's no limit to brain / cognitive functions I'll probably start compiling a list to work on. 

Starting 2022 with a lot of love

 Just as I approached 2022 I had the chance to experiment with some MJ. This very potent natural herb from mother nature connects with the Endocannabinoid system.

I had I think 2 or 3 opportunities to experiment. What I discovered is a symbiosis when you partake in this herb with others, kind of like the rastas when they sit and pass the pipe and connect to Jah together. 

On one occasion having taken a hit whilst outdoors and then back indoors entering that other state around family. 

My nieces were over for the holidays. I stood beside the door mostly concerned with my eldest sister who was very quiet - for her it does wonders on the arthritis and mellows her mood. I observed my nieces playing talking mucking about. I came upon the realisation that the state I was in, children are already naturally in that state. You can say their Endocannabinoid system is naturally operating as it should- for some reasons us adults have an impaired Endocannabinoid system that we need some plant medicine to get us hooked up again.

The other occasion was similar- just found myself very connected to that other state except I was around family. I even watched a movie (Spy) and everything about it was intense. Me and my sister would laugh in unison with a very similar laughter. Of course I have to take care of my lungs so I did not take it that often. My blood sugar was dropping that pasta with cheese just didn't cut it. I needed to throw in some jam for a bit of flavour. People get the munchies because blood sugar levels drop. 

Something that did become a habit was me incessantly chewing gum.

I had no idea how bad it was until my family would express their disgust. I can't blame them, my chewing was bad. I became so hooked I needed 2 or 3 pieces of gum at the same time. 

So that's pretty much how I rolled into the New year. I also started off having relationship issues with my boyfriend but I stayed calm and patient and I told him that I am working on some New Years resolutions. 

I told my twin flame whom I sometimes communicate with that I'm working on a biohack that helps you fall in love. You can fall in love without being in a relationship and I especially wanted to figure it out for him as he is in a loveless marriage. Most people unfortunately are in loveless companionships these days and that's such a tragedy. Really, it does break my heart.

All of a sudden a new guy comes into my life. Like a gust of wind. I ignored the calls and texts as I am super paranoid when I get calls from unknown numbers. Suddenly he would call me more than my current boyfriend at the time. He made me realise my own suspicions; that the relationship I was in was doomed. After a lot of soul searching I ended relationship with boyfriend. 

I told my twin flame about it and I shared the name of the substance that I was going to try; phenylthalamine (PEA). This is released when people fall in love. The key is to try with MAO inhibitor such as hordenine.

Meanwhile I was still speaking with new guy. 

To cut a long story short I fell in love with the new guy. The funny thing is I had yet to try my new substance. He certainly had qualities that I never really thought about. He was a very simple humble guy. He was certainly not my type. It just happened so suddenly but some time after getting to know him. I tried to rationalise my feelings by telling myself it was the chewing gum.

 The chewing gum has aspartame which is a source of phenylalanine which converts to PEA, the very substance that is released when people fall in love - the one I've been meaning to get hold of and experiment with. Such is my life, so serendipitous.

At one point there was so much love overfilling my heart that I begged God for his mercy. It reminded me of a euphoric experience when I did a liver flush. But just as quickly as this guy randomly found me he departed. 

I'm not sure if I can call it romantic love, or the possesive obsessed kind because there was none of that. And I know what it's like to be infatuated, I think it happened once when I binged on chocolate which also releases PEA except it made me feel lovesick over a guy at the queue in a supermarket who didn't even so much as look at me.

It was an eye opener and it made me realise that I wasn't in love with my ex boyfriend whom I even considered marriage with. And I learned the most important lesson of my life, never marry unless you're in love. Sounds like common sense but people have no idea in seeking relationship just how much of it is dictated by fear. Love is fearless. And I believe this love is in our heart ready and waiting to be tapped into and sometimes you meet someone and they can trigger it.

The PEA is something I will still experiment with. However it isn't something to take all the time and can be dangerous with side effects. 

I'm thinking to use just before full moon as I think that neurotransmitter release are based on the moon's position. Different neurotransmitters are dominant in different phases. 

Update 2021

It's been a while since my last post...life has been a rollercoaster ride in that time and the added pressure of the plandemic hasn't helped much. There is major division now between people than any other time especially in the last few decades. We are currently at war and the war is a psychological one. Being brainwashed by all the propaganda etc I can literally see many people walking down the plank voluntarily. It deeply saddens me but the brain dead can no longer be helped. Àll over the world authorities are destroying and corrupting people. Still there's hope...maybe

Despite all this going on all around me I'm trying my best to gain access to the furthest reaches of my brain...it's hard work!

I have been working on biohack formulas, some work and others are quite dangerous. Need to becareful with this...I press one wrong button and the brain can turn to mush

I haven't bothered with Sally, she stains my teeth now which is why I'm working on the biohack formulas

In the last few months I have learned quite a bit about the lunar cycle, just like nature and all the natural cyclic events, tidal waves etc the human body was also designed to be in tune with it. So I am currently using the lunar cycle as a map

With the biohacking I have only managed to reach the basic states of mind that correlate with various emotions but need to go much deeper than that and that's where the binaural beats come in. I'm doing deep intense research and experimentation for this and yet still there is room for improvement

I'll try to post more updates on any breakthroughs as well as the formulas I'm using