I have only chewed salvia leaves on and off recently. Sometimes I'm astounded how made up our reality is. Meaning; In the grand scheme of things none of us really exist, not even the things we perceive. This happens often and each time when I experience the insight in my salvia excursions it feels so new because coming out of salvia state I am back to reality and the conditioning of my mind makes me behave as if all this is real; ie holding onto possessions, ideals and beliefs etc.
Yesterday with all my days anxiety I decided to take a break and listen to some music and instantly I recalled my experience with a being, a God like being. A presence that warms me up always without fail.
I didn't simply receive an insight, it was more of an instant awareness that this presence is always with me in all my experiences. It is this presence that facilitates the entire functions of this body, this world. Without effort as I listened to the music the lyrics pulsate with meaning, in our ordinary state this absorption is impossible. This presence controls veins, arteries every function in our body. I became further absorbed with some retrospective thinking which is the great thing about chewing leaves is that a large part of my ordinary daily awareness ego consciousness (call it what you will) is present so that I can vividly recall vividly my experiences. With the extract it can take time to assimilate new insights.
Listening to a song and thinking at the same time, suddenly my internal parts in the upper torso are pulsating. The rhythm of my heart beat is the same as the beat of the music I am listening to almost as if by magic my organs have an intelligence of their own and can change the rhythm of my heart beat. But wait this isn't magic, doesn't our amazing organs function without any mental effort on our part already? My veins and every internal part was following the same symphony of the tones in my ears. It really indeed seem magical.
I begin to feel inspired about a movie based on this experience and my mind is immersed thinking up a plot line to convey just how I felt in that moment. An experience I would sum up as God-realization.
God-realization, according to Meher
Baba, is the highest state of consciousness and the goal and ultimate
destiny of all souls in Creation. A soul that realizes God experiences God's infinite power, knowledge, and bliss continuously.
The following are things I myself have been trying to understand in this other state.
God within each individual severs the connection of mans awareness of God. Why? For the play of this world can only happen when man has lost all memory of his origins. Should he know his origins then he would be like a God. But here's the paradox, that even in mans state of amnesia, he continues to create. With his expanding imagination, storage of memories in the brain cell but it seems he is equivalent to that of a Robot and possibly has a pre-programmed destiny. The Buddha has also said it: We are a result of what we think but this implies that we can then change our destiny.
If you observe your own thoughts and see if those types of thoughts correlate with your current existence the connection will be there.
So why all the Chaos? Is life a sick joke and is God then a sadist because as beautiful as this world is there is darkness? No, because we are clearly creating according to our own imaginations. I'm still trying to work out the part why innocent children suffer then.
In this salvia state I am trying to understand the relevance of humans to God. I couldn't help but think that God did not need us, nor even want us even though there is this sense of longing in the songs I listen to and these are inspired by God. For anyone of any religious denomination I imagine this may sound a little upsetting, but I'm afraid God is just too happy and jolly to care how your daily life effects you. Why? Because you have been given the True Power to resolve your life yourself, what more can a God deny if he gave you everything from the very beginning. After this experience I feel even more prompted to go back to using Law of Attraction to fix some things currently going wrong in my life at least as a new experiment.
Another thought came flashing in, if we are the sum of what we think how can we know that which is unknown. It is seems we can't know the unknown, to know the unknown we must ourselves become unknown. Lose one's identity, central ego self. Who then comes back to express the unknown? So in the salvia state as I lose my identity, and the brain empties of all memories how can I come back to communicate what I perceive when we live in a world dictated by the 5 senses which are wholly dependent on thought. Or it could it be that the 5 senses themselves go through some kind of transformation but again the 5 senses are dependant on thought. You wake up in the morning and even though in your mind you don't think about how your eyes see, ears hear and the feeling of the duvet against your skin in that moment there is the underlying thought of "I". "I" wake up and this "I" is assigned a body. I was speculating all this in the Salvia state.
This is the lyrics to one of the songs I was listening to:
http://www.bollynook.com/en/lyrics/9260/tumse-milke
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