I'm in the garden - my big sis suddenly panics and tells me there's a massive snake on the soil. I look at the ground and see a garden hose and tell her this. Then I see something moving. It gets in the kitchen on the worktop I tell my sis it's not a snake, it's a lizard. I get out of kitchen a little uncomfortable. Look through gap in door and scared that the lizard is coming through.
I did some reading on Lizard totem and here are some of the messages I connect with:
* Lizard medicine is the shadow side of reality where your dreams are reviewed before you manifest them physically. - I am applying my thoughts to manifest a certain dream which I want to realize and continuously I am finding myself moving in that direction.
* The psychic characteristics inherent in the lizard teaches those with this medicine how to awaken their own abilities by making choices that honor every part of one's life. - I am assisting more and more on awakening certain abilities but I realize perhaps it does start with the choices that I make in my life in which I'm noticing changes.
* When lizard appears it signifies a need to go within and analyze your present reality and once done, move with confidence and conviction out into the world of new beginnings. - There are some huge changes that I am making, but I do need more confidence to head further into this new world that I envision.
* A powerful totem to have, lizard reveals your weaknesses, your strengths and prompts the energy of change. - This energy of change has already taken effect, the changes are noticeable in simple things like food, and how I live in general. What I've also noticed about this is I'm being drawn to Sources (books, articles etc) things that help my make sense of my new found desires.
"Dreams are shadows showing your fears and hopes.
Make a dream log and record your dreams.
Look for your symbolic and reoccurring dreams and study them carefully." Lizard Totem
I have not been recording my dreams, there's too much to write about however there is one reoccuring dream that has got my attention which is an awakening of psychic abilities. In the dreams I have psychic moments and in some events I'm being told that I have these abilities. In a most recent dream I am being told by my grandmother how a certain number of my cousins (I come from a very big family) have informed her about how special I am and that my capacities are beyond the scope of imagination. She tells me that they have the ability to see(clairvoyance) and that I am just like them.
Friday, 15 January 2010
Thursday, 14 January 2010
Lost In Translation
I woke up at 3:15am - about 5am tried to relax and fall asleep without any intention for projecting in any way.
Within a few minutes I could sense something was heading my way - the sensations were at first so unusual I can't really describe it and where it started. I was encapsulated by this energy - it was becoming extremely concentrated in my head. There was some light vibration in my teeth - they were buzzing. I sensed it was definitely a reaction from this energy. As the energy seemed to slow down I could feel the movement of my teeth changing. Eventually this buzzing converted into chewing which suggests that either the energy was balancing or just slowing down.
Suddenly I find myself in another room - I walk around and end up at a reception. Behind the desk is a man who looks at me smiling. I smile back realizing we're speaking in a completely different language. We're using the language of facial expressions, mostly just smiling. Though I understand it I'm still a little confused. He responds with a smile telling me to go to the next reception desk as the person there speaks English. This second reception is to the left - there I am greeted by a young man who suddenly in mid conversation disappears. He seems to be the only one talking as I am too busy trying to figure out why he's suddenly invisible which caused me to pay very little attention to what was said. Can't recall much after this.
Within a few minutes I could sense something was heading my way - the sensations were at first so unusual I can't really describe it and where it started. I was encapsulated by this energy - it was becoming extremely concentrated in my head. There was some light vibration in my teeth - they were buzzing. I sensed it was definitely a reaction from this energy. As the energy seemed to slow down I could feel the movement of my teeth changing. Eventually this buzzing converted into chewing which suggests that either the energy was balancing or just slowing down.
Suddenly I find myself in another room - I walk around and end up at a reception. Behind the desk is a man who looks at me smiling. I smile back realizing we're speaking in a completely different language. We're using the language of facial expressions, mostly just smiling. Though I understand it I'm still a little confused. He responds with a smile telling me to go to the next reception desk as the person there speaks English. This second reception is to the left - there I am greeted by a young man who suddenly in mid conversation disappears. He seems to be the only one talking as I am too busy trying to figure out why he's suddenly invisible which caused me to pay very little attention to what was said. Can't recall much after this.
Tuesday, 12 January 2010
Physical Teleportation Attempt
With just a little bit of research into Teleportation I thought I'd try it out. I was really hoping to read about other peoples experience on this but right now there seems to be very little information. Teleportation is different from Astral Projection or OBE, the difference being instead of projecting an astral body/form you are projecting the physical body. Also astral projection/OBE are considered to be a form of teleportation.
As a starter I decided I was not going to delve into any techniques - this will be done purely by intent and during the hours that I tend to astral project. Before sleep I asked my spirit guide network to assist me in removing blocks, barriers anything that stops me from using these abilities. I then added that I would like to wake up early so that I could practice teleportation and if I can't stay up make sure the birds are singing.
An Example on Intent Manifesting
I had a dream of cycling down a familiar town, passing by shops, supermarkets, market stalls, people that I know, people that I have never met etc. Sometimes I would suddenly be walking instead of cycling. At one point I'm next to a crossing, everyone is in a hurry including me. I'm about to cross when suddenly a mini bus approached at high speed out of nowhere. I took a quick step back holding my breath and noticed another man next to me with the same reaction - that was too close.
I continued on cycling next to a supermarket, from a distance I see a young girl running. There are two police officers approaching. I get a feeling that she did a bit of shop lifting and was getting nicked for it. I almost cycle past the officers when I'm suddenly stopped by a woman who I figure works for the supermarket. She says 'How dare you? Can't you see the police officers are trying to deal with a crime here?' I gather that she wants me to move back and wait until the officers have dealt with the girl. I am so annoyed at this authority, I shout back with a torrent of anger 'How dare you talk to me like that?' I continue to insult her with a lot of swear words and I'm pretty much using her drab appearance and character as my form of attack. At the same time there is a girl standing next to me giggling. This is the dream that I wake up from at 4:15am. I feel very groggy and almost within 5 minutes almost fall asleep, but then the birds start chirping and I remember my intention.
Second Part of Intention
Stayed up for an hour and it was decided that I am going to project to the bathroom - lol, just until I can really be sure that it's easy to project back to starting location, so that is what I'm experimenting with at the moment. I attempted at 5:15am, there was a little difficulty in relaxing but managed to let go of all the tension. Soon I seem to be still awake physically, there was a surge throughout my body inducing sexual feelings which according to Dr. Bruce Goldberg has been reported by some teleporters something that happens a lot lately upon waking up. Something feels very different and I feel fear rearing its ugly head, my teeth was doing something strange and I can't seem to recall what. Suddenly I'm in the bathroom only I realize it's not my bathroom yet the entire setting and layout is exactly like my bathroom, it just felt really different somehow. I look at the mirror and surprised to see myself clearly I wonder if I've achieved my first conscious teleportation. I assume if I have indeed projected my physical body then my hands should not go through the mirror. My hands went through. I stared at my reflection and willed myself backwards. My body was gliding back just as I had willed it to with a simple thought.
I look out the window and see some very large trees, this time I walk through the wall. I walk outside for a brief moment not sure about my location. End of recall, got up at 7am. I can't really determine if this was a physical projection since I'm not sure what is to be expected. The only real way of verifying this is if a second person is witness to the dematerialization and materialization of the physical body. I'm going to experiment more on this and update here with details.
As a starter I decided I was not going to delve into any techniques - this will be done purely by intent and during the hours that I tend to astral project. Before sleep I asked my spirit guide network to assist me in removing blocks, barriers anything that stops me from using these abilities. I then added that I would like to wake up early so that I could practice teleportation and if I can't stay up make sure the birds are singing.
An Example on Intent Manifesting
I had a dream of cycling down a familiar town, passing by shops, supermarkets, market stalls, people that I know, people that I have never met etc. Sometimes I would suddenly be walking instead of cycling. At one point I'm next to a crossing, everyone is in a hurry including me. I'm about to cross when suddenly a mini bus approached at high speed out of nowhere. I took a quick step back holding my breath and noticed another man next to me with the same reaction - that was too close.
I continued on cycling next to a supermarket, from a distance I see a young girl running. There are two police officers approaching. I get a feeling that she did a bit of shop lifting and was getting nicked for it. I almost cycle past the officers when I'm suddenly stopped by a woman who I figure works for the supermarket. She says 'How dare you? Can't you see the police officers are trying to deal with a crime here?' I gather that she wants me to move back and wait until the officers have dealt with the girl. I am so annoyed at this authority, I shout back with a torrent of anger 'How dare you talk to me like that?' I continue to insult her with a lot of swear words and I'm pretty much using her drab appearance and character as my form of attack. At the same time there is a girl standing next to me giggling. This is the dream that I wake up from at 4:15am. I feel very groggy and almost within 5 minutes almost fall asleep, but then the birds start chirping and I remember my intention.
Second Part of Intention
Stayed up for an hour and it was decided that I am going to project to the bathroom - lol, just until I can really be sure that it's easy to project back to starting location, so that is what I'm experimenting with at the moment. I attempted at 5:15am, there was a little difficulty in relaxing but managed to let go of all the tension. Soon I seem to be still awake physically, there was a surge throughout my body inducing sexual feelings which according to Dr. Bruce Goldberg has been reported by some teleporters something that happens a lot lately upon waking up. Something feels very different and I feel fear rearing its ugly head, my teeth was doing something strange and I can't seem to recall what. Suddenly I'm in the bathroom only I realize it's not my bathroom yet the entire setting and layout is exactly like my bathroom, it just felt really different somehow. I look at the mirror and surprised to see myself clearly I wonder if I've achieved my first conscious teleportation. I assume if I have indeed projected my physical body then my hands should not go through the mirror. My hands went through. I stared at my reflection and willed myself backwards. My body was gliding back just as I had willed it to with a simple thought.
I look out the window and see some very large trees, this time I walk through the wall. I walk outside for a brief moment not sure about my location. End of recall, got up at 7am. I can't really determine if this was a physical projection since I'm not sure what is to be expected. The only real way of verifying this is if a second person is witness to the dematerialization and materialization of the physical body. I'm going to experiment more on this and update here with details.
Thursday, 7 January 2010
Drill #5
Early morning woke up from pelvic movement which slowly stopped as I started becoming aware of it. Was too groggy to wonder why that happened so I let my head fall back on the pillow. The drill in the back of my head did not alarm me, it was slow and had impacted gradually. I was able to lift my head up and tried to resist this by turning over on my back, I just wanted to sleep. I realized as I moved that I could cause some damage by making these sudden movements so I remained still and just let it carry on.
When the drill started to slow down, sensations calming, my entire body, especially my back was in extreme amount of pain. I faded out of this pain into a very vivid dream state. I was dreaming about a talk show with two female presenters. They were discussing spiritual stuff I can't recall but one part I significantly remember is when one of the presenter was introducing a new singer, she sings a song and performs a snake like dance. There is also another dancer in the background. I watch the act and think 'Well, this is something that's not gonna sell'. Then I became mesmerised by the words and realized the purpose of this song was not to make it sell. I can't recall the words but at the time it felt like I needed to pay attention.
When the drill started to slow down, sensations calming, my entire body, especially my back was in extreme amount of pain. I faded out of this pain into a very vivid dream state. I was dreaming about a talk show with two female presenters. They were discussing spiritual stuff I can't recall but one part I significantly remember is when one of the presenter was introducing a new singer, she sings a song and performs a snake like dance. There is also another dancer in the background. I watch the act and think 'Well, this is something that's not gonna sell'. Then I became mesmerised by the words and realized the purpose of this song was not to make it sell. I can't recall the words but at the time it felt like I needed to pay attention.
Wednesday, 6 January 2010
Dreams of Healing, Issues
As I've mentioned before dreams are shifting, some causing an emotional release, some illuminating issues I probably have to deal with.
Waterworks
I had a particular dream in which there was a lot of waterworks. The dream was so vivid, colors were intense and bright. The room is brightly lit - almost like a golden glow emanating everywhere I look. I find a futuristic looking camera and play around with it for a bit - it's a very neat device and looks like a mechanical starfish. I look around me there are others present but I don't focus on them. At one end of the room there is a large table set up covered in a cream cloth, sat on the table is a gigantic framed photo of a young woman with a very beautiful smile. I looked away and focused more on the environment. We're at a memorial service, the girl in the photo has passed away. I take another look at her, she is very pretty. There is a glow coming out of the picture. I am suddenly aware that somehow I am related to this person.
I am overwhelmed by a deep sadness I've never felt in waking life. To be honest I've never felt grief from anyone passing away though the people I know who have passed away I've never been too close with. This grief that I was in the process of was part of a deeper loss. The tears flowed out without control. I don't cry in front of other people which has always been a rule for me. This is so profound I don't even bother to wipe the tears. There are others next to me, I don't notice anyone as hysterical as me. I ask almost speaking to myself 'How did she die?' The response is she was raped and then murdered. I ask about her culprit and learn that he's serving life sentence in prison. There is no change in my emotional output, I'm grieving, there's no room for anger. I continue to cry gallons of tears.
Scream
In another dream I'm walking down a long stairway, I scream. There is a boy I knew from primary school who is astounded at my loud scream. I'm surprised that he calls that loud, so I scream louder revealing my capacity to scream. I walk away and outside I'm in my old town, outside the flat I lived for most of my childhood. Things are different, there's a blue pub right next to the flat. Opposite my block is another block of flats that has changed drastically. There is a row of market stalls and shops that in reality never existed during my time there. At the top from a balcony a woman is screaming out for the people gathered below to shut up. I'm hiding under a stall for reasons unknown. I hear a man speaking. He's annoyed by the annoyed woman, he is saying that people come for last minute shopping to get their party gears and have some fun. He's trying to understand her anger at everyone.
Compliments
I'm in a shopping department, there is a friend nearby. She walks up to me and looks into my eyes with piercing intensity. She then says "Do you know how special you are? You are so unique and special. Do you even know how amazing you are?" I'm baffled and ask why she thinks I'm so special. Somehow I feel threatened by all these compliments and as I take a walk down memory lane there was one point in my childhood where I was bullied by a gang of 15 girls for the very fact that my teacher would continuously compliment me and unfortunately make a lot of comparisons unknowingly creating dangerous consequences for me. This is probably why I have never really genuinely appreciated compliments.
Freak Weather
I'm inside a mansion looking through a large window. Outside there's a snow storm. I look up in the sky where there is a helicopter losing control and plummeting to the ground. There is a spark of lighting that momentarily flashes and continues for a bit. I'm viewing the weather forecast for the next several days. The next two days there is a symbol for this lighting spark of a brilliant white light. On the third day the entire sky will be filled and emanating a brilliant white light. The image suddenly disappears and I'm left staring out the window. I see a few people struggling looking for shelter from the storm. There are a few elderly people who are in much need of help. As I move out I hear someone next to me, a relative telling me that I can't bring these people in. I protest but don't argue for long and head for the door. Upon opening the door everyone storms in.
The scene changes and we are all gathered in a massive room where our purpose is to discuss the subsequent events of days to come. A woman is seated to my right and immediately as I sit down this person is annoyed at the distance between our chairs. She tells me rather rudely to move away a bit more. I comply, but still she gets very rude and tells me that I have to be at least 5cm away. I look down as she tries to show me how much 5cm is with her hands. I simply ignore her as I am fully aware that I am sitting at a greater distance. Then the same person is instructing everyone to take their coat and scarf off. Nobody is listening to her as they are busy absorbed in their conversations. She then signals at me to do something about this. I tell everyone to take their coat and scarf off at which point there is an echoing silence and everyone is following my instructions. It is at this point where my waking consciousness is awake - but I don't think (while I'm there) that I'm dreaming in fact, I'm suddenly a little disoriented and trying to remember how I got there. I realize I haven't taken my own coat off and begin to remove it. End of recall
Waterworks
I had a particular dream in which there was a lot of waterworks. The dream was so vivid, colors were intense and bright. The room is brightly lit - almost like a golden glow emanating everywhere I look. I find a futuristic looking camera and play around with it for a bit - it's a very neat device and looks like a mechanical starfish. I look around me there are others present but I don't focus on them. At one end of the room there is a large table set up covered in a cream cloth, sat on the table is a gigantic framed photo of a young woman with a very beautiful smile. I looked away and focused more on the environment. We're at a memorial service, the girl in the photo has passed away. I take another look at her, she is very pretty. There is a glow coming out of the picture. I am suddenly aware that somehow I am related to this person.
I am overwhelmed by a deep sadness I've never felt in waking life. To be honest I've never felt grief from anyone passing away though the people I know who have passed away I've never been too close with. This grief that I was in the process of was part of a deeper loss. The tears flowed out without control. I don't cry in front of other people which has always been a rule for me. This is so profound I don't even bother to wipe the tears. There are others next to me, I don't notice anyone as hysterical as me. I ask almost speaking to myself 'How did she die?' The response is she was raped and then murdered. I ask about her culprit and learn that he's serving life sentence in prison. There is no change in my emotional output, I'm grieving, there's no room for anger. I continue to cry gallons of tears.
Scream
In another dream I'm walking down a long stairway, I scream. There is a boy I knew from primary school who is astounded at my loud scream. I'm surprised that he calls that loud, so I scream louder revealing my capacity to scream. I walk away and outside I'm in my old town, outside the flat I lived for most of my childhood. Things are different, there's a blue pub right next to the flat. Opposite my block is another block of flats that has changed drastically. There is a row of market stalls and shops that in reality never existed during my time there. At the top from a balcony a woman is screaming out for the people gathered below to shut up. I'm hiding under a stall for reasons unknown. I hear a man speaking. He's annoyed by the annoyed woman, he is saying that people come for last minute shopping to get their party gears and have some fun. He's trying to understand her anger at everyone.
Compliments
I'm in a shopping department, there is a friend nearby. She walks up to me and looks into my eyes with piercing intensity. She then says "Do you know how special you are? You are so unique and special. Do you even know how amazing you are?" I'm baffled and ask why she thinks I'm so special. Somehow I feel threatened by all these compliments and as I take a walk down memory lane there was one point in my childhood where I was bullied by a gang of 15 girls for the very fact that my teacher would continuously compliment me and unfortunately make a lot of comparisons unknowingly creating dangerous consequences for me. This is probably why I have never really genuinely appreciated compliments.
Freak Weather
I'm inside a mansion looking through a large window. Outside there's a snow storm. I look up in the sky where there is a helicopter losing control and plummeting to the ground. There is a spark of lighting that momentarily flashes and continues for a bit. I'm viewing the weather forecast for the next several days. The next two days there is a symbol for this lighting spark of a brilliant white light. On the third day the entire sky will be filled and emanating a brilliant white light. The image suddenly disappears and I'm left staring out the window. I see a few people struggling looking for shelter from the storm. There are a few elderly people who are in much need of help. As I move out I hear someone next to me, a relative telling me that I can't bring these people in. I protest but don't argue for long and head for the door. Upon opening the door everyone storms in.
The scene changes and we are all gathered in a massive room where our purpose is to discuss the subsequent events of days to come. A woman is seated to my right and immediately as I sit down this person is annoyed at the distance between our chairs. She tells me rather rudely to move away a bit more. I comply, but still she gets very rude and tells me that I have to be at least 5cm away. I look down as she tries to show me how much 5cm is with her hands. I simply ignore her as I am fully aware that I am sitting at a greater distance. Then the same person is instructing everyone to take their coat and scarf off. Nobody is listening to her as they are busy absorbed in their conversations. She then signals at me to do something about this. I tell everyone to take their coat and scarf off at which point there is an echoing silence and everyone is following my instructions. It is at this point where my waking consciousness is awake - but I don't think (while I'm there) that I'm dreaming in fact, I'm suddenly a little disoriented and trying to remember how I got there. I realize I haven't taken my own coat off and begin to remove it. End of recall
Friday, 1 January 2010
Resolving Guidance, Restrictions and Blockages - A New Year Resolution
Last night at 2am before falling asleep I read out loud an invocation statement from the Self Healing Handbook. The purpose of this invocation is to release any barriers or restriction that hinders guidance or limits intuition.
After closing my eyes the spontaneous movements began, arms, legs and inner movements. A gasping breathing sound was releasing from my mouth. Fell asleep and awakened at 5am, went back to bed at 7am. There was an extreme tugging at the back of my head, my brain or some part of it was being yanked out. The sensation was unbearable and holding tightly on the pillow did not help. I struggled and signalled a stop sign, my recall is hazy after this. Awoke at 11am feeling exhausted.
After closing my eyes the spontaneous movements began, arms, legs and inner movements. A gasping breathing sound was releasing from my mouth. Fell asleep and awakened at 5am, went back to bed at 7am. There was an extreme tugging at the back of my head, my brain or some part of it was being yanked out. The sensation was unbearable and holding tightly on the pillow did not help. I struggled and signalled a stop sign, my recall is hazy after this. Awoke at 11am feeling exhausted.
Wednesday, 30 December 2009
Sensing Subtle Energies
Tried an exercise last night, percieving and sensing subtle energies. At the first instance, less than a minute of moving my hands I felt the energy in between which was very subtle. Continuing with the practice the energy became more dense.
I would recite the statements then close my eyes and wait for the energy to increase. There was a gentle magnetic force pulling both hands in together. I would then stretch my hands out a little and then back in and there was that resistance mentioned in the article. I made a final statement to draw the energy within me, amazingly I felt it move into my chest where there was a slight constricted feeling that smoothed out, then tingles spread throughout my body.
A few years ago when I began exploring astral projection I had tried out a few energy percieving exercises (most on how to percieve aura and trying to create psi balls). One sunny day trying to percieve energy between my index fingers a few centimeters apart I was able to feel the same pressure. The energy oozed up so much I saw a misty smoke flowing outwards. I was definitely left astounded but at that time I didn't feel the pull to continue the practice. However, now I feel drawn to exploring these areas.
I would recite the statements then close my eyes and wait for the energy to increase. There was a gentle magnetic force pulling both hands in together. I would then stretch my hands out a little and then back in and there was that resistance mentioned in the article. I made a final statement to draw the energy within me, amazingly I felt it move into my chest where there was a slight constricted feeling that smoothed out, then tingles spread throughout my body.
A few years ago when I began exploring astral projection I had tried out a few energy percieving exercises (most on how to percieve aura and trying to create psi balls). One sunny day trying to percieve energy between my index fingers a few centimeters apart I was able to feel the same pressure. The energy oozed up so much I saw a misty smoke flowing outwards. I was definitely left astounded but at that time I didn't feel the pull to continue the practice. However, now I feel drawn to exploring these areas.
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