Focus 12 progress

The past week I've been practicing moving to Focus 12 by listening to 'Introduction to Focus 12'. Unfortunately I've been falling asleep during practice, which is mostly due to exhaustion and practicing late.

Despite feeling that somehow my exhaustion level was rendering the hemi-sync sounds useless, last night I made some progress. For starters I managed to remain conscious throughout the entire track except for at some point towards the end where I experienced a brief click-out. My mind did wander off a little but managed to bring myself back and focus - I think this is what has happened the past week - my mind would wander off and I'd end up falling asleep.

When moving up to F12 an image began to appear in some area of my consciousness. It was some kind of orange block fusing with different colours - I thought maybe it represents the chakra system. Remembered not to get analytical and just go with the experience. More images took form, most of which I couldn't comprehend. The images were subtle and not as clear as the hypnagogic imagery I've had in my astral experiences but then again I feel I wasn't looking at them directly with my eyes - it was definitely more like sensing them.

After practice a few random thoughts entered my mind and shortly after I fell asleep. The thoughts were far too random and completely unrelated for me to even recall right now.

Wave II - Threshold #1, Introduction to Focus 12

Last night I moved on to Wave II, Introduction to Focus 12. In the past few days listening to Wave I CD I've been either clicking-out or falling asleep, I suppose the latter is expected with 'Exploration, Sleep' and my observation has revealed that practicing late night when incredibly exhausted does not help much.

Even though I have yet to to experiment with the 'Free Flow 10' track of Wave I, I feel it's time to move on and I'm glad I've made the transition sooner because listening to 'Introduction to Focus 12' where Monroe points out that these exercises are only tools to learn and use and that they do not create changes in you I realized my expectations have increased since resuming practice, no doubt due to higher levels of stress - it has made me desperate in some ways almost as if I'm seeking a quick fix.

Although this realization is nothing profoundly new it has made me more aware of the fact that I have some expectations - expectations I intend to release.

Last night's experience: Practiced at 10pm, surprisingly remained conscious throughout. Half way felt an intense movement around sacral chakra point, feet and calves began to tingle for a few minutes. After this I began heating up which I think may be due to having thick covers over me. When I practiced moving back and forth between Focus 10 and Focus 12 I was tempted to end the track but forced myself to continue. I think I was trying way too hard at this point which I know only hinders progress.

Reading

Time: 7:00am
Technique: WBTB at 4:50am (set internal alarm clock night before, I woke up from a disturbing alarming dream) - listened to hemi-sync advanced focus 10 at 6:00am, set intention
Mood/Feeling: Sleepy, unbothered
Symptoms: Hazy vision
Duration: 20 mins

Experience: At 7:00am I was feeling really sleepy and hazily affirmed that I will remember any astral experience as best as I could. I suddenly became aware of a sheet of paper in front of me with writings. Can't recall any exit sensations. I focused on the writing which was surprisingly clear and managed to read one paragraph. I skimmed through and focused on particular words, at this point my vision became a bit hazy and the words made no sense. I continued attempting to read until eventually I somehow found myself in the spare room. I noticed smoke coming out of an old telephone on a stand which does not exist in reality, at the time I didn't think much about the anomaly. Concerned by the smoke I quickly pulled out the cord. Lost consciousness and slipped into a dream state. Unfortunately I have no memory of what the paragraph read.

Rapid Solar Plexus Pulsations

Last night at 11pm instead of listening to hemi-sync I listened to an Abraham-Hicks workshop. Esther Hicks, who channels the collective consciousness 'Abraham' has a rather pleasant voice and I find it particularly soothing, so it's no wonder why as I listened to the track I began relaxing deeply. The sound of Esther's voice became inaudible as I began to fade away from normal waking consciousness.

Eventually, when I returned to C-1 I could hear her voice along with sensing an intense pressure in my abdomen. I felt rapid pulsations in my solar plexus. It felt like a ticking bomb ready to explode. I felt an emotion that I can't even begin to describe, not even sure whether it was good or bad. I placed my hand on my abdomen and felt the sensation only slightly despite pulsations still occurring rapidly and rather violently. Overwhelmed and even feeling a bit nauseous I took a deep breath and the pulsation slowly subsided.

Though I've experienced chakra sensations in the past, my knowledge in this area is still somewhat limited. According to a few sources online if the solar plexus chakra spins too fast it is an indication of several negative aspects. Unfortunately I can relate to a few of these aspects, some of which have been more dominant lately.

I'll be doing some reading up on the chakra system.

Hemi-Sync: Exploration, Sleep - body jerks and time perception

Last night at 11:30 I listened to Wave I - Discovery #5 - Exploration, Sleep. Before listening to this I was already feeling sleepy and I knew that I would most likely be unconscious throughout the exercise.

Within a few minutes my head began to feel heavy weighing more than the rest of my body. During the resonant tuning exercise I began feeling even sleepier and decided to let go of trying my best to remain conscious. At this stage I lost consciousness only to be startled by some body jerks, my right arm flung upwards as if trying to regain balance.

I continued with the process not sure which stage I was at but just listened to the sounds rather than following instruction. Once again lost consciousness until I was able to hear rapid beats followed by Monroes voice unable to comprehend what was being said. I had the perception that quite some time had passed by and thought I might be on the next track - time read 11:45. Closed my eyes - lost consciousness until track ended, again I had the perception of hours passing by.

I've also been getting a lot of body jerks in the meditation sessions I've started up recently. Could be due to feeling physically exhausted lately. Woke up this morning feeling very refreshed and also able to recall my dreams which had stagnated in the past few weeks.

Setting Internal Alarm Clock

The most effective time to AP is early morning. Although AP's are possible any time of the day, mornings are the most effective because most of the conditions required for AP's come naturally at this time. If you wake up at 4 or 5am or have had at least 5 hours of sleep your body will be naturally relaxed therefore making it easier to reach the 'mind awake, body asleep' state with the added bonus that external noise is at a minimum.

All of my AP experiences have so far occurred in this way. I never use an external alarm clock simply because it is annoying to be alarmed in that way. It's quite natural for me to think of exactly what time I wish to wake up before going to sleep and wake up almost exactly the time intended. I have a regular internal alarm setting for 7:30am and have changed this on a few occasions for the purpose of practicing AP.

There is no need to intend every night the time you are wanting to wake up if your intention is to wake up at the same time every morning. After several intentions or at least once you find yourself waking up when required suffice it to say that your internal alarm clock is set and working. It would be wise to practice this in conjunction with an external alarm clock at first to avoid waking up late.

This technique works well as a precursor for the Wake Back to Bed technique.

Click here to read an interesting article on internal alarm clock.

Daily Practices

These past few weeks I have been extremely busy, but I realise even with such a busy lifestyle I can do things that will help me relax and perhaps ease some of the stress I've been feeling lately. I have noticed that stress comes with a feeling that everything feels like work even relaxing. With a deliberate intention to practice relaxation I should be able to regain some balance. Here are some things I intend on including in my daily routine to help me relax and progress on my personal development:

Meditation - I've put meditation off for far too long now, my intention is to meditate for at least 15 minutes every day. I started already a few days ago, managed to practice at night before falling asleep.

Hemi-sync - Gateway Experience, Wave I - I now have the remaining Wave Cd's in this series, but intend on listening to Wave I for about a month before I move on to Wave II.

Deep Breathing - I don't know why I don't practice this every day, it's so incredibly easy and requires only 5 minutes. Started this morning and I'm already feeling calmer and at ease today. My intention is to practice deep breathing at different intervals - morning, midday and evening. I will be practicing deep breathing at least once a day since I use this to relax and proceed with meditation.

Introspection - I used to do this almost every day up until the start of this year. A good 20 minutes to 1 hour of examining my thoughts and emotions on a regular basis has helped me in the past. I find it shifts my perspective on all things that matters to me on a very deep level. This is also a time when I set goals and intentions. My desire to spend more time on this is intense, therefore less need to set an intention.

Hypnosis - I haven't listened to any of my hypnosis Cd's for a long time. Not sure if the effects of hypnosis are more temporary than they are permanent. Then again the results I've had in the past were minor - I think they were actually in proportion to the amount of times I practiced, which was just a brief period. I intend on listening to hypnosis on occasions rather than on a daily basis.

Of course there are more ways to simplify ones life and I'm not limiting myself to these tools nor are these tools limited for the sole purpose of relieving stress since each tool has many benefits.

Silhouette Arms

About a week ago I had a rather unusual experience - unusual because it hadn't taken place during an astral projection. I had woken up on this particular morning and despite feeling mentally and physically alert something felt out of place. I had an unusual urge to check my arms. Shockingly they were completely black, silhouette arms and so I thought I must be projecting. I flopped my hands about and they felt incredibly light. I pressed my hands against the mattress and - this felt very real. I then reached out for the wall expecting, hoping to go through. After a few seconds the colour of my arms returned. It was like my eyes were somehow adjusting - I realized at that moment that I was physically awake the whole time.

Attempting To Visit My Nephew

Time: 7:30am
Technique: WBTB at 4:30am - listened to music followed by hemi-sync discovery #3 - advanced focus 10
Mood: Fidgety - Unable to relax
Duration: 20 mins

At 6:30am I attempted relaxing which was extremely difficult and the sound of birds chirping was not helping at all. I decided to use the time to practice the hemi-sync exercise and set some intentions for my expected AP experience. After reading through a few chapters of Robert Bruce's 'Astral Dynamics: A New Approach to Out-of-Body Experiences' book I thought about how the ability to AP must be incredibly natural for children and how his own experiences had confirmed this. I think most people who AP have had the ability since childhood but simply forget them over time.

I thought of my 4 year old nephew - intelligent with sharp precise memory and of course absolutely adorable. He is also beginning to reveal some intuitive ability.
He lives some 100 miles from London and although in APs physical distance is completely irrelevant getting beyond my bedroom window is usually a challenge in itself. I know that the actual physical route is not necessary and so I intended to visit my nephew and expected the journey would be easy and a lot quicker than in physical - maybe even instantaneous.

Experience: At 7:30am relaxation came naturally, as soon as I closed my eyes wavy lines appeared. There was a mild vibration in my head with the usual buzzing sensations. I thought the waves will transform into frequency wave lines that have occurred in other experiences. Then I heard the sound of water running and sounds of ocean waves. The wave lines formed into an ocean with waves, suddenly filled with a great number of dolphins. The scene was in cartoon and it was like looking at a TV screen - full screen view. I heard birds chirping, they could be the same birds I heard chirping earlier in the physical. The dolphins were swimming, jumping and giggling. I was so in awe with this particular scene, the sound, the colours. Despite it being a cartoon I was amazed with how real it all appeared.

Slowly the image began disappearing and I perceived that I was back in bed lying on my back but able to see clearly in a birds eye view that my duvet was covered with sparkling snowflakes - a very beautiful sight. I lifted my arms, they looked pale almost white. At the same time I sensed the birds eye view. This could be the mind-split Robert Bruce mentions in the book - so far some of his concepts haven't sunk in and I have yet to read the book completely - and properly.

My hands flopped hanging loosely, at this point I was at SP. The perception of the sparkling snow and the state of SP faded and I returned to C-1, heard the physical birds still chirping.

Still very relaxed I tried again, closed eyes. Head buzzed, began hearing male chanting followed by frequency sound transforming to classical music. Sensing physical body, head felt incredibly heavy, neck was straining so I slowly adjusted to C-1.

Attempted AP again an hour later at 9:00am - this time more focused on my original intention for this AP. Practiced deep breathing for a few minutes and felt the light trance sensation almost feeling the head buzzing - unfortunately I was interrupted by knock on door.

Afterthoughts: Although I didn't exactly visit my nephew the cartoon was rather intriguing - may very well relate to my intention. I still need to read more about the mind split. For my next few APs I intend to visit a few people and hopefully be able to verify these visits. Maybe setting these intentions can help me progress since I haven't been very specific with my goals for AP.

Zooming In and Out

Time: 6:50
Technique: WBTB and Affirmation
Mood: Calm and relaxed
Duration: 15 mins

Experience: After being awake for almost two hours doing nothing (I can use these awake times to listen to hemi-sync and next time intend on doing so). Once I felt more sleepy I affirmed 'I astral project' and closed my eyes. Shortly after I sensed the onset of vibrations in my head and some buzzing type sensation and sounds. I could still sense my physical body and was lying on my front with my arms on the pillow. The sounds were low but the sensations were intense. A minute or so later I got up in a very drunk manner, thought I felt somewhat light as though I can pass through solid matter my hands pressed down on the mattress. I was definitely still in my room, on my bed, my body, everything seemed physical. Despite appearances I felt different - spaced out - zoned out, but doubting that I was APing. I sat up and looked at the window, at the closed blinds . Suddenly I zoomed to the blinds and then backwards. As I zoomed back I felt tiny like I had once before in another experience - my entire room was a giant version. Just as soon as I thought I couldn't get any smaller I was back in bed feeling mild vibrations and buzzing in head. I deliberately decided to end it - snapped out and returned to C-1.