Yesterday I had no intention to use Salvia but the pain in my stomach was so unusual - so terribly painfully sharp and deliberate. Strong feeling they were doing something, not sure if intentions were to harm but had to find out so I got some Salvia ready at the same time the whole day my mind was occupied with thoughts of starting a new simple life in Bulgaria and during blending with salvia this was also on my mind.
There was a being like everything that I percieved in physical connected to make this being and it was fully aware of my presence at the same time a lot of other activity taking place. Mouth keeps opening on auto. I feel a cool air coming closer touching skin, beings made of natural elements - something about the mouth opening. I am being rushed through or something is moving towards me and the being I was aware of is now communicating with another being. They felt like relatives - the other being felt to be a part of Bulgaria - what we think of as a country was actually an entity, a living being. The being is informing Bulgaria about my intentions to move there. There is some kind of acceptance emmitting from Bulgaria and maybe even a trace of excitement.
Lots of beings coming through - doing something moving body parts - something going on near ears and intense pulling near head region. Do that mind stretching thing where through my mind stretch them away from me - a clearing. There's something at top of head and I stretch it away - feels like it is exposed, open. I feel out of control with the whole stretching thing.
Got interrupted twice - once in the initial process of chewing and then later after it ended. I feel the people interrupting were drawn to me through their force. Was incredibly agitated by this interference and vented anger. Something about this interruption and the physical others around me.
The other day had a session where I moved towards the energy patterns of the rioters without directing this movement, felt vulnerable that somehow they'll be attracted to my neighbourhood. At the same time their energy pattern was a second model of what takes place in the physical. Trying to understand - does the physical activity come first and then this non-physical activity copies it (meaning re-enactment) or is it the other way around?
Strangely when taking Salvia with particular intentions and goals in mind these things lose importance - meaning I feel so content with the knowledge of what reality is that outwardly I don't desire anything and all intentions and goals are based on desire. For eg. with the Bulgaria experience even though it was related to my intention at the same time I'm seeing what reality is and because of this I am no longer attached - but coming back to physical it takes a day or so for unimportance to wear off and I am back to desiring, back to my set goals.
In another experience I was becoming aware of 'I' as the thinker and then there was another beside this 'I' - this other attached to me but for a moment 'I' was it and there was this partial self-realization.
Have been taking lower dosage of Salvia during these sessions.
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