Instant Salvia

Last night got sheesha ready - eldest sister and niece present in room. Had my sister try Salvia for the first time and after a long time using up the half a gram of 10x extract it did not work. Niece tried some and still it did not work except for a slight twitch.

Thought that either they are not smoking it properly or the herb was not burning properly. Took over, inhaled twice and immediately things started to change feeling presence - face changing but internally. I was still coherent and felt that I had absolute control over how deep I can go. Whilst the changes take place I ask more to myself than to the other two in the room 'How comes it worked so easily on me and not you guys?' My sisters response was that she didn't understand how it worked on me because I was acting so normal and then asked me what was happening.

I felt that I could not describe it - it would actually make me look loony. Imagine I blurted out to my sister that she was not real - that who we have assumed we are is a complete fiction. That is always the foundation of the experience - and then there's this other process where other beings enter the scene, who they are I cannot say except that once I had a realization that they were a part of a unit that I assumed to be me and at other times they played specific familial roles. Initially when I first saw them they appeared as seperate individuals until the realization experience.

I managed to control the bodily movements - in fact it was more of an energetic wave pulsing internally and externally. With the face movements I asked if sister can see anything - nothing yet I could tell that those 'face' beings are moving about. Perhaps they didn't come out but simply moved inside - maybe sister and niece are not at a stage where they can see the movements physically. Something to do with the layers of fear - I know I went through quite a bit personally myself to get to a stage where these phenomenas do not scare me so easily. Perhaps other personal factors played a role in why it did not work for the other two.

Still in transit of that other state I was conversing as though I was in this usual physical state - only I knew that I am not entirely physically focused. Interestingly they both felt burning in the throat, as for me it was as simple as inhaling vapours - no burning, no eye watering (which was a huge problem before).

Sister tried once more, quickly taking pipe out of mouth saying that the water is coming through it, at that same moment I felt that presence and got an undeniable feeling that they or it did not want or could not allow my sister to take anymore. I took the pipe to check, smoked it knowing that no water will be coming through - after two pulls instantly salvia pulled me into that other state a litte more where I have a clearer perception of them but did not want to close eyes to see them with the other non-physical lens or what can probably be called the internal eyes.

Something has been going on in the brain for a while now since taking Salvia - inside I could feel them hammering away in the head region. Waking up from sleep it is most intense yet painless, especially after this morning I woke from sleep whilst eyes still closed head fluttering.

Yesterday when I sat on the bed with a bag resting on the side it kept shaking. I got off the bed and it stopped shaking instead there was glimmer of it moving in waves.

Tonight:
I tried to smoke salvia alone, almost did not bother - for me personally using a sheesha seems like such a long process - set the sheesha up, burn the coal and smoke in and then after that is over need to clean sheesha - feels like a chore. Didn't want my relatives who were around the house to know about my Salvia session so the smell of smoke was another issue. I used a cherry herbal mix designed for sheesha smoking and then placed plain salvia on top.

Anways decided to give it a try and instantly found every sound - everything the body could percieve amplified. Paranoia was one of them - can hear relatives outside room talking about smelling smoke, niece was incredibly annoying.

Quickly dipped coal in water and focused on diminishing smoke smell all the while resisting that other state - could feel that if I had closed eyes the others would have appeared. Got in bed after 15 minutes no visuals of them but there was intense tactile sensations.

Lately as I fall to sleep there have been electrical charges in nerves most concentrated in left calves - most of the time feels like somethng short circuiting makes me jump at night. There has been incidents of bodily spasms that occur randomly.